The Truth Shall Set You Free, But Sometimes Requires Some Creativity!

Growing up in the Dean household, there were very few non-negotiables. Mom and Dad were fabulous about walking us through situations, but there were very few hard core limits that were set upon Chris and me - with the exception of one thing. All good parents teach their children that “honesty is the best policy.” But this idea has been placed on steroids under the Baptist Rabbi’s roof. Dad could put Abraham Lincoln to shame. Honesty is extremely important to my Dad. To this day, I’m not sure if this virtue was a product of his raising from a Missionary Baptist minister or if it developed within himself along his journey of ministry. But Sam Dean does not tell a lie. And he does not tolerate people who do. There are very few things that will send Dad to a state of anger, but someone who is not honest will certainly takes him to an unhappy place.

I can attest that if you have ever paid Dad for a funeral or wedding, taxes have been reported and paid. I can assure you that if you have told Dad something in confidence through a counseling session or through a simple conversation, it remains sealed in a vault. There have been times that I learned NOT to ask him if my hair looked good, if he liked my outfit, or if he thought I looked like I had gained weight. I knew I would get an honest answer! A few weeks ago, he had to pay a man to fix his heating unit at his house in Jonesboro. He did not feel that the man charged him enough to repair, so he made sure to pay him an additional amount. He could not bear to think he had cheated someone in anyway. As we have explored outside agencies to come in and help them with lawn care and housework, it is a non-negotiable that they work for an agency that pays taxes on what he gives them. My Dad would tell you that honesty is the key to a clear mind. 

On the surface, we would all pretty much agree with his thinking. After all, who would disagree that “Thou shalt not tell a lie.” Seems simple, until certain situations arise. Being a minister often means that you are well-fed. There are Sunday School parties, Christmas parties, Wednesday night meals, small group gatherings, etc. that ensure that food and socialization are always available. Earlier in his ministry, a sweet lady decided to bless him with a beautiful homemade pie including a plethora of fluffy meringue. For those of you who know Mom and Dad, they LOVE a chance to enjoy homemade desert! Dad thanked her for her kind gesture and eagerly anticipated taking the pie home to enjoy. Mom and Dad cut the delicious looking pie and placed a large piece on their plate. As they both placed the first bite in their mouth, they immediately discovered something was wrong!!! Something terrible was wrong!! It tasted horrible! They couldn’t continue….not even with the first bite! How could something so beautiful taste so horrible? They came to the conclusion that the sweet, elderly lady must have left a key ingredient out of the pie. It did not affect the visual presentation of the gift, but certainly affected the taste. At church the next Sunday, the lady approached Dad and asked the dreaded question, “How did you like the pie?” Dad hesitated as his core values were being tested. What was one to say? After all, he was very thankful for her kind gift, and he would never in a million years want to hurt her heart. However, he cannot tell a lie! Thank goodness, the Baptist Rabbi can think quickly on his feet. He responded as any honest, God-loving man would do. “Thank you for the pie! It certainly did not last long around our house!” 

While Dad still laughs about this story, he does not laugh at the seriousness of honesty. He has often recognized that being honest comes with consequences. Sometimes being honest means that others will disagree or become upset. As Dad served on several committees and boards, he was never ashamed to speak his mind in an honest manner. While some may not always agree with what is said, people have come to trust that “what you see is what you get” with my Dad.  He firmly believes that the truth shall set you free. There is no doubt that my Dad can lay his head down at night with a clear conscience that he is a man of his word. There is a great deal to be learned from the actions and values of the Baptist Rabbi. Telling the truth is not always easy, but it is the right thing to do. Sam Dean has taught me that honesty is the best policy, but sometimes it does take a little creativity! 

Sidenote #1: For those of you who have baked Mom and Dad items, don't worry! It was not you! This happened a very long time ago in one of his previous churches. Ha!