The Truth Shall Set You Free, But Sometimes Requires Some Creativity!

Growing up in the Dean household, there were very few non-negotiables. Mom and Dad were fabulous about walking us through situations, but there were very few hard core limits that were set upon Chris and me - with the exception of one thing. All good parents teach their children that “honesty is the best policy.” But this idea has been placed on steroids under the Baptist Rabbi’s roof. Dad could put Abraham Lincoln to shame. Honesty is extremely important to my Dad. To this day, I’m not sure if this virtue was a product of his raising from a Missionary Baptist minister or if it developed within himself along his journey of ministry. But Sam Dean does not tell a lie. And he does not tolerate people who do. There are very few things that will send Dad to a state of anger, but someone who is not honest will certainly takes him to an unhappy place.

I can attest that if you have ever paid Dad for a funeral or wedding, taxes have been reported and paid. I can assure you that if you have told Dad something in confidence through a counseling session or through a simple conversation, it remains sealed in a vault. There have been times that I learned NOT to ask him if my hair looked good, if he liked my outfit, or if he thought I looked like I had gained weight. I knew I would get an honest answer! A few weeks ago, he had to pay a man to fix his heating unit at his house in Jonesboro. He did not feel that the man charged him enough to repair, so he made sure to pay him an additional amount. He could not bear to think he had cheated someone in anyway. As we have explored outside agencies to come in and help them with lawn care and housework, it is a non-negotiable that they work for an agency that pays taxes on what he gives them. My Dad would tell you that honesty is the key to a clear mind. 

On the surface, we would all pretty much agree with his thinking. After all, who would disagree that “Thou shalt not tell a lie.” Seems simple, until certain situations arise. Being a minister often means that you are well-fed. There are Sunday School parties, Christmas parties, Wednesday night meals, small group gatherings, etc. that ensure that food and socialization are always available. Earlier in his ministry, a sweet lady decided to bless him with a beautiful homemade pie including a plethora of fluffy meringue. For those of you who know Mom and Dad, they LOVE a chance to enjoy homemade desert! Dad thanked her for her kind gesture and eagerly anticipated taking the pie home to enjoy. Mom and Dad cut the delicious looking pie and placed a large piece on their plate. As they both placed the first bite in their mouth, they immediately discovered something was wrong!!! Something terrible was wrong!! It tasted horrible! They couldn’t continue….not even with the first bite! How could something so beautiful taste so horrible? They came to the conclusion that the sweet, elderly lady must have left a key ingredient out of the pie. It did not affect the visual presentation of the gift, but certainly affected the taste. At church the next Sunday, the lady approached Dad and asked the dreaded question, “How did you like the pie?” Dad hesitated as his core values were being tested. What was one to say? After all, he was very thankful for her kind gift, and he would never in a million years want to hurt her heart. However, he cannot tell a lie! Thank goodness, the Baptist Rabbi can think quickly on his feet. He responded as any honest, God-loving man would do. “Thank you for the pie! It certainly did not last long around our house!” 

While Dad still laughs about this story, he does not laugh at the seriousness of honesty. He has often recognized that being honest comes with consequences. Sometimes being honest means that others will disagree or become upset. As Dad served on several committees and boards, he was never ashamed to speak his mind in an honest manner. While some may not always agree with what is said, people have come to trust that “what you see is what you get” with my Dad.  He firmly believes that the truth shall set you free. There is no doubt that my Dad can lay his head down at night with a clear conscience that he is a man of his word. There is a great deal to be learned from the actions and values of the Baptist Rabbi. Telling the truth is not always easy, but it is the right thing to do. Sam Dean has taught me that honesty is the best policy, but sometimes it does take a little creativity! 

Sidenote #1: For those of you who have baked Mom and Dad items, don't worry! It was not you! This happened a very long time ago in one of his previous churches. Ha!

Disabling Reverse

Dad was the one charged with the dreaded parental responsibility of teaching me how to drive. Combining this task with his lack of patience did not create an ideal combination! He spent lots of time teaching me the aspects of defensive driving. I can still hear him saying, “You always want to anticipate a mistake that a nearby driver might make and compensate for it. Always be on the look-out for ill-equipped drivers.” I learned that skill quite well, but reverse always gave me trouble. When getting my driver’s license, the assessor asked me to back into a parking space, of which I did a pathetic job. I somehow managed to perfectly straddle the white lines instead of landing my car in between them! I think he had a soft heart because it was my 16th birthday, so he gave me my driver’s license anyway as a gift of pity. Dad always joked that he gave me one month before I had my first wreck. And I did not disappoint. A few weeks after turning 16, he was called away from the pulpit on a Wednesday night right before church. He was informed that I had backed into another car in the McDonald’s parking lot. Yes, reverse had gotten me into some trouble. 

Throughout the years, Mom and Dad have always made it a priority to spend time with my kids. Mallory and Drew have grown to depend on both of them for support. Some of their favorite times is listening to their “Popman” tell stories and giving them words of wisdom. Mallory will graduate high school this year. With the entire world in front of her, she has many life decisions at her fingertips. We all remember the pressure that this entails. As she often does, she called up Popman to take her to dinner for a free counseling session. As the dinner unfolded, Mallory discussed with Dad all her options of college choices, extra-curricular opportunities, future desires, and fears. As always, the Baptist Rabbi had words for her to cling to in the upcoming days. He encouraged her to listen to her desires and what God was speaking to her. He explicitly told her that when she made a decision, she needed to move full steam forward with all her heart and soul. He told her that there would be times that she would be tempted to play the “what if” game and wonder what her journey would be like if she would have chosen another path. He emphatically told her to never look back once she made her decision. He told her that life is full of experiences and missed opportunities. Sometimes we will make the right choices and sometimes we will regret the decisions that we made. But all experiences are worthwhile if we learn from it - even the bad ones. However, if we focus on what could have been or what we would have done differently, it can consume our lives and keep us from profiting from the present. He encouraged her to spend great time in thought and prayer making the best decision she can make with the information she has at this time. Then don’t look back. Don’t give the past any power.

I would like to say that my skill of driving in reverse has gotten better over the years, but it simply hasn’t. My family still makes fun of me trying to back out of the driveway trying to avoid our brick wall. But maybe there is a reason. Maybe it is because it is deep seated in me that there is not power in going backwards.  What we have passed and encountered is behind us. There is much more peace and comfort in looking ahead and driving forward. But in driving forward, we must remember our defensive driving skills. For there are crazy drivers out there. We must think ahead, anticipate potential catastrophes, and adjust our moves based on other’s decisions. We must make the best decision with the information presented around us. Unfortunately, we will still sometimes crash. But the good news is cars spend much more time in the forward gear than in reverse. There is positive power in limiting the amount of time we spend in reverse.

Strategies for Walking on Ice

It has been an interesting 2 weeks in East TN for sure! I can’t remember a time when we have canceled school for 2 weeks straight due to continuous snow and ice invasions. We all have fond memories of snow events from our childhood. I recall our house being grand central station with snow cream in the kitchen, the dryer in constant motion drying wet clothes, sleds all over the driveway, and the most fabulous event of all…..night sledding down the infamous Armstrong Hill! Snow always brought a new level of excitement in the Dean household, and no one loved it more than the Baptist Rabbi.

Over the past 2 weeks, we have witnessed organizations shut down due to the treacherous weather. That never happened at our house. We were never afforded the opportunity to call in to our part time jobs due to the weather. Dad would make sure that we got there, and he would offer to pick up anyone who may be hoping to use the snow as an excuse to opt out of work! I rarely recall church ever being canceled due to the weather. Dad would hop in the car and open it up for anyone who wanted to worship. Dad could never sit idle in the snow. He could always find a reason to go tackle the ailments. It was a challenge he just couldn’t turn down. And he was known a time or two to take Chris out on the roads for a few rounds of doughnuts!

Of course, Dad being the fabulous Dad he was, could even use a snow event to teach lessons. One day, he decided he was going to teach us the proper way to walk on ice. Yes, ice. He put on wool socks to demonstrate to us that how the socks would stick to the ice, creating a safe environment for travel. He confidently put on the socks, carefully explaining the science behind this safety trick. With his head held high, he exited the back door and stepped onto the concrete patio. He took his first step of demonstration. Then it happened……he took a leap of faith that ended up as a tumble of terror. His feet immediately slipped out from under him and his head crashed flat onto the concrete of ice!!! As I hear of all the injuries that have happened on the ice in the past few weeks, it is a shear miracle that he survived. Still to this day, we are pretty sure he ended up with a concussion. But for those of you who know my Dad, he is very hard headed. There would be no trips to the doctor. 

This past week, Dad once again ventured out in the inclement weather to get Cameron, his grandson, a birthday card. He knew the roads were icy. As he exited the car, he strategically planned his steps to safely enter Food City. He successfully traveled over the ice to the front doors. He discussed his strategy for safely making the trip. He planned his steps carefully to try to hit areas of the concrete that had melted or had turned into slush. For those of you who are wondering, he did not have on his wool socks! He is definitely one to learn from experience, so he had on his hiking boots! He got the needed supplies and returned to the car. As he lifted one leg to get in the car, his other foot slipped. Down he went. Only this time, he could not get up alone. The ice was much too slippery. A good samaritan saw him fall and quickly came to his rescue. No injuries, other than his pride. Would this be enough to keep him from braving the snow and ice? I think you already know the answer.

Snow and ice present challenges. It demands a certain respect. We can create certain strategies and plans to help us tackle the icy conditions, but they are not fool proof. At times we are bound to fall. At times, our pride is bound to take a tumble. But the ice has never kept my Dad from attempting to live while it is present. One fall did not keep him down. And I am willing to bet that the most recent fall will not alter his viewpoints. At times, life gets icy. Traveling the road can be tricky and requires us to implement a completely different skill set to effectively maneuver through it. Sometimes, we think one strategy will be effective, and we simply fall on our hard heads. Other times, we are as careful as we can be, and we still fall on our hiney! At some point, our pride will simply hit rock bottom. Sam Dean has taught me that a few falls should never stop us from living. A few hits on our pride should not stop us from standing back up and walking with our head held high. Life’s ice is dangerous. But when we take a fall, there is opportunity to learn new approaches to effectively tackle the next storm.

Overcoming Car Sickness

Isn’t being carsick a terrible feeling? Growing up, I remember getting car sick traveling through the mountains of North Carolina on our way to Lumberton, my Mom’s home. On occasions, Mom would give me Dramamine, although I’m not sure if it was really for car sickness or simply to knock me out! I recall dreading this portion of the trip because I never knew if it would hit me or not. It was unpredictable.  I never knew what the curves through the mountains would bring me. However, once I arrived to Lumberton, I always enjoyed playing with my cousins, exploring the swamp, hanging out at Margie’s house, and going to my cousin Billy's convenient story where he always greeted me as “Kelly Springfield” (and I still don’t know why!). 

I think most of you would agree that we don’t like being unsure of what the immediate future will bring. Life certainly has its unknown curves, twists, and bends. If you have had the pleasure of knowing my Mother, you know that she has battled many health issues along her journey. Her prognosis has never been positive. My Mom and Dad moved to Clinton when I was 6 so he could become the pastor of First Baptist Church. When he interviewed with the search committee, he had to confess their current situation. Mom had been diagnosed with an auto-immune disease called Scleroderma. The prognosis was not uplifting. If it continued to progress, my Dad would be the single father of 2 small children. It was very important to him that he was completely honest with the church regarding their current state. Graciously, the church had faith that this is where God wanted our family to be. Mom and Dad did not know what the immediate future held, but they took a leap of faith and kept living. They continued driving through the curves.

Luckily, the scleroderma has remained in remission over the years. However, Mom’s health issues have always given them a different perspective on life. They were ready to tackle the twists of life, taking nothing for granted. They traveled to Hawaii, flew to Europe, hiked with friends, took beach trips, continued to travel to North Carolina, bought a house in Jonesboro (a place they still hold close to their heart) and in Greenville (Dad’s mother’s house), rented cabins with friends, got up early to see sunrises, completed mission work in New Zealand, and the list goes on and on. Mom and Dad knew that they could not predict what God had in store for them, but they knew that He wanted them to live, experience life, and trust HIS plan.

For those of you who know, Mom has continued to battle multiple health issues. At this time, it has affected her mobility and her ability to socialize on the level in which she prefers. Dad continues to battle Parkinson’s and permanent PHN from shingles. However, his mind is still sharp as a tack! He often tells me that he is so thankful that he made it a priority to do the things he wanted to do when they were able. He is so thankful that he didn’t wait to experience all the joys of life in his later years.

As they continue to be troopers, never knowing what the next day holds, they live with no regrets. I can only imagine how “carsick” they became when they were delivered the news that Mom would possibly not be with us past her 30’s. They both could have easily given in at this moment, but they didn’t! They drove through the mountains, embracing all the twists and turns. They didn’t try to play God, predicting what the ultimate outcome would be. They knew it could have played out a multitude of ways. But until the plan is fully disclosed, they continue to live.

Scott and I found ourselves in a “carsick” situation this last spring when he was diagnosed with a malignant tumor on his retina.  This type of cancer is so rare, they do not do treatments in the East TN area. So we set off on a journey for 9 days in Memphis for treatment.  For those of you who have walked the journey of cancer, you know the exact roller coaster this presents. Five years of CT scans, blood work, an unknown future, and the list goes on and on. Only people who have experienced this know how this changes your life. Scott and I naturally wanted to close ourselves up and play the “wait and see” game. But we kept reminding ourselves of the lesson to be learned from the “Baptist Rabbi” and his wife. Crossing the mountains is tough work. It’s unpredictable. There will be moments of car sickness; moments when we just want to take the Dramamine and sleep through until we get to our ultimate destination. But instead of wasting our time and energy trying to predict God’s plan, we will continue living, doing the good work He has set us to do. He is already there on the other side of the mountain, earnestly desiring us to live life to the fullest through all the unexpected bends of uncertainty.

Thank you, Mom and Dad, for living your life as an example of how to live in peace with God's plan.

MOVE!

Sometimes situations can collide, creating a perfect storm. I vividly remember an example of this when I was in 4th grade. Being the fabulous role model Sam Dean was, he decided that he would become my Optimist (community league) basketball coach. After all, what better way to serve as a role model, while developing stellar athletes on the Clinton Elementary basketball court? Dad arrived at the first practice with drills prepared, anticipating an eager group of girls ready to tackle the court with passion and skill. He was ready to take on the challenge of coaching a group of girls to the #1 spot. However, we showed up for practice talking about the cute boys, discussing the next sleepover, and most important of all, deciding what outfit would be worn the next day. Who had time for drills, skills, and coaching feedback?  Towards the end of the season, we found ourselves with no wins. And it was bad. Very bad. Despite his best efforts, I remained scared of the ball, running in the opposite direction anytime it came my way.

I remember one particular game where we were losing by approximately 45 points. With a few seconds remaining, Suzie Webber, a member of our team, threw up a last second shot. SWOOSH! It went in and closed the spread to 43 points! Our entire team busted out in loud cheers, jumping hugs, and extreme celebration. After all, who wouldn’t celebrate a last second shot!!?? The perfect storm was created! A mature adult, with serious coaching ambitions, clashed with a group of silly ten year old girls who just wanted to have a good time. And the conflict of goals met with loud crashes of thunder, bright bolts of lightning, damaging winds, and sheets of rain! I’m pretty sure that The Baptist Rabbi lost a bit of his religion at that very moment! He could not fathom our celebration of a last second shot with the existing score. Somehow he managed to maintain his cool in front of the team. However, he was not finished with me. So he put into action a coaching plan for his daughter, which started with learning a new vocabulary word….AGGRESSIVE.

He gave up on our team winning a single game during the season, but he was determined that he was going to teach me how to be respectfully aggressive. My goal during the next game was to not hide behind people on the court, and I had to foul at least one person. During the last game, I finally got in touch with my “inner aggression” and I actually fouled out. As I heard the referee’s whistle blow, signifying the last foul, I saw my Dad clapping and screaming on the sidelines, giving me a standing ovation. I can only imagine what the rest of the audience was thinking! Of course, we lost.  However, Dad considered my foul out to be a success. I moved! I was no longer idle.

Dad has never been one to sit. He couldn’t afford to. While he grew up in a house of love, there was not a great amount of finances to support higher education. He always knew that education would be his key to a better life, but the road would not come easy. Dad had to drop out of ETSU his first semester because he could not find transportation to school each day. This became a pivotal point in his life. He could have easily used this as an excuse to quit. It would have been easy for him to simply say, “It is not meant to be. It must be God’s will for me not to go to college.” However, he did not. He engaged in respectful aggressiveness, and he took action.  He transferred to Tusculum College where he could catch the bus to school. Grocery store wages helped him pay his way.  When he received the call to become a minister, he had some tough decisions to make. He could have easily said, “It is just not meant to be.”  However, he created a respectfully aggressive plan of how he could pay cash for both college and seminary. Amazingly, he graduated with his Masters of Divinity with no school debt. How? He moved. He did not sit idle. He crafted a goal, developed a plan, and executed that plan with extreme precision. He took control of his situation, sacrificed immediate gratifications, implemented some healthy aggression, and fought his way through some tough years - trusting God every step of the way. God certainly provided, but Dad had to work hard for it. There were many bumps on the way and many God-sent people that helped him through. It was not sent down on a cloud from heaven wrapped in a big red bow!

In Dad’s 50 years of ministry, he has seen another perfect storm occur in people’s lives. We often hear Christian's make the comment, "If it is God's will.." At times, we use the comment to give us permission to sit idle and wait passively for His will to occur. We wait for God to do all the work. Then when things don’t improve or get better, we tend to blame it on the “Will of God.” The clash of idleness and the will of God has occurred, and the storm is in full force. God indeed has a will for us, but he has also given us free choice to determine what decisions we will make toward his will. Do we hide when the basketball gets thrown our way? Do we find ourselves as passive recipients of the other team’s decisions and actions?

Dad taught me that God did not put us here to live passively and let the world happen TO us. He placed us here to be active participants in this world. We can only find solace in the storm when we embrace the peace that God has desires for us. However, we have to be willing to get up, follow the call, and work for it. God will pave the walkway for the journey, but we must commit to taking the steps on the road. Sometimes that means being respectfully aggressive, moving out of our comfort zone, and standing up for what is right. God never promised that it would be easy, but He did promise to provide if we listen to His will. So what are we waiting for? God is ready. Let’s get up and MOVE!

Sidenote #1: My Dad, still to this day, says that coaching that basketball team was one of the most frustrating things he has ever done. At the end of that season, he officially retired from Optimist coaching! :)

Sidenote #2: After 2 years of basketball, I only scored 2 points - both foul shots. I also retired from basketball in the name of saving my Dad’s nerves. :)

The Power of Presence

It's happened to all of us. Those dreaded moments in time when you wish your life had a rewind button and you would instantaneously receive a free “re-do”. It may even be a situation in which you perseverate for many days, wondering if the recipient of your mistake remembers as vividly as you! Several years ago, Scott attended the funeral of one of his friend’s sister. As he approached the family, he worried about the exact words of comfort that he could share with his childhood friend. Being a close friend, it was important to him to provide those magic words of peace that would make the situation just a tad bit better. Inching closer, he quickly found himself face to face where the verbal transaction would begin……..And then it came……..the words of comfort……”Hey. How’s it going?” The end. That was it. That is all that came. “How’s it going?” Immediately mortified, Scott thought to himself, “Really??? Those were my comforting words? How insensitive! Of course he is not doing well! His sister passed away! Can I please initiate that rewind button and have a do-over?” Doing what we commonly do when we have questions in life, he turned to Sam Dean for words of wisdom. And of, course, Dad did not disappoint.

Growing up, I remember my parents always being there. As a 43 year old working mother of two, I now know what a commitment that was. Being a pastor was not a 40 hour a week job. It was a great deal more than 2-3 sermons a week. It involved middle of the night phone calls, long hospital visits, weekend weddings, out of town funerals, Sunday School parties, weekend retreats, long counseling sessions, and spur of the moment crisis management. When he got the call that someone needed him, there was no second thought. Out the door he would go. He left in the middle of the night, and he left in the middle of dinner.  I even remember a few times where we cut our vacation short because someone needed him back in Clinton. Many of you reading this may remember a time that the “Baptist Rabbi” came to you in a time of need. We graciously shared our father with hundreds of families because we knew the power of his presence.

Amazingly, Chris and I never felt the stress of his ministry. He was always there for us. He made an effort to spend alone time with me. In elementary school, I remember him coming in from work and going to the driveway to shoot basketball with me (I also remember how frustrated he would get trying to teach me how to shoot a lay-up, but that is a story for another day).  He made an effort to really listen to me. Growing up, he would always ask about my day, and you couldn’t get off the hook by saying, “It was good.” He would dig deeper. I’m sure I acted like these conversations drove me nuts, but in reality, I looked forward to them everyday. He made an effort to build a family who supported each other. I remember us traveling to all of Chris’s basketball games. A few times, we landed in some shady motels in which I’m sure he was glad to see us escape alive! Finally, he made an effort to support us in all our extra-curricular activities. He never missed one of my 11 piano recitals, although he would probably prefer I not mention that he was known to sneak in late to escape the key plucking of the beginners. I just remember Mom and Dad always being present.

As I grew older, the power of his presence was felt in both happy and tense times. When I received my first A on a college paper, Mom and Dad drove to Carson Newman to take me on a celebratory dinner. My first year of teaching, I was involved in a wreck on my way to school. Not long afterwards, Dad was at school checking on me. Early in my marriage, Scott traveled out of town for a week. After hearing a big bump in the night, Dad drove to Knoxville in the middle of the night to sleep on my couch. No questions asked. No humiliation. Only his presence. Fast forward a few years later... doctors discovered a tumor in my right ear that was going to require a fairly extensive surgery in a Nashville hospital. Within one hour of the doctor delivering this news, Mom and Dad were on my doorstep to offer their presence. This spring, Scott was diagnosed with a malignant tumor in his right eye. Immediately, we were in the presence of my Mom and Dad. In all of these situations, they didn’t have magic words to fix the situation. Honestly, I don’t really recall the exact words that they even said. I just remember how comforting it was to be in their presence. Scott and I have always found Mom and Dad’s presence to be comforting and supportive.

So what words of wisdom did the “Baptist Rabbi” bestow on Scott regarding words to say at a funeral? You probably know by now. Sometimes words just can’t make it better. Many times, our words can’t fix a situation, but our presence is what will have the lasting effect. Oftentimes, people won’t remember specific words spoken, but they will remember who took the time to come be with them. These words still speak to me today as we live in this world of social media. It is so easy to send quick words of comfort on Facebook or via text message. At least for me, I then fall into the trap that I have supported this person in some lasting way. Let Sam Dean’s words of wisdom live in our hearts knowing that there are times when there are no words of comfort, but God can use our presence to offer peace and support both in times of celebration and tribulation. There IS power in our presence.

Skinny Marinky Dinky Dink

I vividly recall the big orange bean bag on our den floor back in the 70’s. It was accompanied by the beautiful yellow and brown plaid couch, wood panel walls, and linoleum gold/cream floors. And we loved it….at the time! :) One of my fondest memories of the orange bean bag was “The Bean Bag Song.” I would curl up on the bean bag with my Dad and he would begin singing…… 

Skinny Marinky Dinky Dink, 

Skinny Marinky do. 

I love you. 

Skinny Marinky Dinky Dink, 

Skinny Marinky do. 

I love you. 

Oh, I love you in the morning, 

and I love you late at night. 

I love you in the evening, 

when the sun is shining bright, OHHHH…… (This is when Dad would pick you up, fall over with you on the bean bag, and begin tickling the living daylight out of you!)

Skinny Marinky Dinky Dink, 

Skinny Marinky do. 

I LOOOOVVVEEE YOU!

Chris and I became very much like Pavlov’s dog. We were conditioned to begin laughing before Dad even remotely got to the “tickle part.” We would beg and beg for him to take position on the bean bag for our daily dose of Skinny Marinky Dink. 

The Dean household was always filled with much laughter. Mom and Dad knew how to balance life’s seriousness with an abundance of laughter. Dad has always had lots of side hobbies, including mastering the art of repairing TVs (this was back in the day of channel knobs and picture tubes - when a layman could actually replace TV parts!!). In the early 80’s, Chris and I were called into Mom and Dad’s bedroom. Dad was very solemn in his announcement for the entire family to enter the bedroom. Upon gathering, Dad calmly set us down and said that we needed to have a family meeting about a serious matter. He informed us that there had been a death in the family. Mom, Chris, and I gasped as we braced ourselves for the terrible news that had just afflicted our family! Dad slowly pointed to the console TV that had lived in their bedroom since arriving in Clinton. He waved the white flag of surrender that he could not revive the old TV. So we were required to do what every normal family would do…….we held a funeral for the TV, including songs, reflective thoughts, and a proper eulogy. To this day, I think Mom might still hold a tad bit of grudge that Dad gave her a heart attack, but this is still a memory that we laugh about 35 years later.

Very few people are aware that Sam Dean has many other talents. He is a great cheerleader! When my best friend, Kristina Pearce Haury, and I would hold cheerleading practice sessions at the house, Dad would join in. He even created his own cheer:

B.O. Stinks

S-T-I-N-K-S

B.O. Stinks

And I might add….he developed some very nice motions with the words! To this day, Kristina and I laugh at this fond memory.

Sam Dean is also a nice dancer. My daughter, Mallory, is a competitive dancer. It is not an uncommon event for him to join her on the den dance floor. I will have to say that the 73 year old Baptist Rabbi has some good moves, and laughter fills the room when he breaks out in his version of a Baptist foot function!

With all that said, Sam Dean is the master of timing. He is acutely aware that there is a time and place for all things. Sam Dean has always been able to deliver a serious, thought-filled sermon that leaves one reflecting for an extended period of time.  However, he can also quickly turn on his silly side that leaves the company around him light headed and filled with laughter. 

Being a pastor can be very serious business. While there are certainly days filled with many happy events, these days are also coupled with sickness, brokenness, conflict, and worries. We will never know the full burden that Sam Dean carried worrying about his congregation, who he considered to be his best friends. But he taught each of us how to balance the seriousness of life’s burdens with an abundance of laughter. The key is knowing the timing of each.

A few years ago, life had sent me a series of challenges in which I was struggling. Late one night, Dad knew that I was working through a fairly tough situation. The phone rings. When I picked it up, I heard his gentle voice of wisdom singing….

Skinny Marinky Dinky Dink

Skinny Marinky Do.

I love you.

Skinny Marinky Dinky Dink

Skinny Marinky Do.

I love you.

Oh, I love you in the morning and I love you late at night.

I love you in the evening when the sun is shining bright…..OHHHHHHHHHH

Skinny Marinky Dinky Dink

Skinnhy Marinky Do.

I LOOOOOVVVVEEE YOU! 

We all have moments when we need a little “Skinny Marinky Dinky Dink” to see us through. Life is serious business. Dad taught me the place that humor has in making memories and the power that light hearted memories play in seeing us through difficult times. As Ecclesiastes 3 tells us, there is a time for everything. Let us not forget that there is a time to laugh! For laughter has the power to help us overcome the heavy burdens of life’s journey.