Words from Heaven

What a week. There is no amount of preparation that can adequately prepare you for the loss of a parent. This past week, we lost one of the most important people in my life. While we had approximately two weeks to prepare for this, words cannot describe the  range of emotions that have overtaken our bodies.

Planning Dad's Celebration of Life was extremely important to us. We wanted it to be everything that Dad had requested. This required a great deal of planning. I worked closely with Katrina, at FBC, on the program for the night. As we were looking at the rough draft, she indicated we needed to find a piece of scripture to go on the left hand side of the program. I told her that I would go home and consult with Chris and Mom, as Dad had many favorite verses.

Knowing that choosing just a few would be very difficult, I decided to have some fun. I found Mom's Bible on the table and brought it into the sunroom. Humorously, and almost sarcastically, I said, "I'm going to open up Mom's Bible, and we are going to let Dad and Jesus speak to us - giving us the perfect scripture for the program." We all giggled as I opened it up to Psalms, shut my eyes, and pointed at a particular position on the page. While we found a few things we liked, nothing "spoke" to us.

I vaguely remembered a friend of mine, Samantha Johnson, posting a Bible verse on my FB page. There were no words - just a reference to a verse. Again, I jokingly said, let's see what that verse says. Maybe He is speaking to us through FB! I looked on FB and saw, Numbers 6: 24-26. I opened up Mom's Bible to this verse. As I turned to the correct page, I saw that a cardboard picture of Jesus's hands were stuck in her Bible on this very page. Again, we all laughed that maybe Dad and Jesus were speaking to us. Maybe this insert was on this page for a reason!

Then I read the verse aloud to Mom and Chris:

"The Lord bless you and keep you;
The Lord make his face to shine upon you,
And be gracious unto you;
The Lord lift up His countenance upon you,
And give you peace."

I looked up, and Chris had tears in his eyes. He said, "That is exactly how Dad would end each service on Sunday morning. After the benediction, he would come down front, raise his hand, and bless the people of FBC. Then he would walk out to the organ playing." All of us sat in amazement - the perfect verse had been found! Dad found a way to communicate it to us from heaven.

And so it was....just like every Sunday morning when he was a preacher. At the end of the Celebration of Life, his dear friend, Ron Mouser, came to the podium and said,
"The Lord bless you and keep you;
The Lord make his face to shine upon you,
And be gracious unto you;
the Lord lift up His countenance upon you,
And give you peace."

The organ immediately boomed. I could feel Dad's spirit in the front of the church. And there was no doubt that my Dad was smiling from heaven, pleased with his final earthly service.

We began by making humor....because the pain was so prevalent. However, turning pain into humor was quickly replaced with awe and peace. Do I think that this was just a coincidence? Absolutely not. The Holy Spirit is alive and well. We just have to make sure that we slow down and pay attention to what He is saying. My attempt to joke and make light of the pain was quickly turned into a meaningful, peaceful experience where God's words spoke to all three of us.

As Moses was called to bless his people, God continues to bless us, even through painful times. My prayer is during these times, I can slow down enough to soak in His goodness. God bless!

Embracing the Pain

Celebration of Life Service - words from Kelly and Chris

Sam Dean was always a man of his word. If he said it, he meant it. He always spoke the truth. Sam Dean was always a planner. He made his wishes known. He said there would be no funeral, for this is not a sad occasion. He always said that he could not complain about his life - he had lived a life full of memories, accomplishments, and joy. He often said that he was more fortunate than most and he was abundantly blessed. He made us promise that we would do a celebration of a life well-lived and well-blessed.

He was also adamant about one more thing. There would be NO preaching. He said he had done enough of that and heard enough of that over his lifetime and he would not be having any preaching while celebrating his life! For those of you who know our Dad well, this comes as no surprise!

So today, we are here to honor his wishes! We will celebrate, maybe through some laughter and maybe through some tears, but the goal of tonight is to honor a great man who has touched the lives of many that will leave a lasting legacy for generations to come.

Our Dad was always more of a teacher than a preacher. We would be here for days if we talked about all the life lessons he has taught us both through his words and through his actions. Anyone who had a brief encounter with my Dad could instantly tell there was something special about him. Something genuine, sincere, and humble. He could be tough as nails, but it always came from his passions and with a compassionate heart. In the ICU, we had several nurses return to his room and cry with us because they had developed such an attachment to him. One nurse came back days later, kissed his head and said, "It has been an honor to take care of you, sir." The doctor who managed his care spent a great deal of time talking to us and eventually asked, "Do you care if I ask what he did for a living?" As we told him about our father, he replied, "I knew that there was something special and unique about him. I could just feel it in his presence." Even during our Dad's last days and last breaths, he still was impacting those around him. He wasn't even able to speak, but they felt it. What an amazing gift he had. He was always so humble, he never realized the significance of his impact or how well he was loved by so many. God gives each of us a gift that we are to use for the glory of Him. There is no doubt that he took this command seriously.

The last week he was home, I, Kelly,  had him walk to the mailbox with me. While we were walking, I said, "Don't you hate the times when you are surrounded by sadness and you know there is joy, but you have a hard time finding it?" He stopped, looked at me and said, "This is part of life. There are periods of happiness and periods of pain. There are times where it is appropriate to laugh and times where it is essential to cry. Both are equally important. Don't suppress the pain......bear through it and don't be afraid to feel it, for it is a part of life."

Our father loved hard. Our father always put other's needs before himself. He showed us all the true meaning of being a servant of the Lord. There are such mixed emotions on this night. Our family's heart has never hurt so deeply. But as the wise Sam Dean has taught us, we will all hold tight to each other as family and friends and feel the pain, knowing it is a part of life. We will remind each other to balance the pain with the promise that one of the greatest men we have ever known is in the hands of Jesus and celebrating  after hearing the words, "Well done, my good and faithful servant."

Thank you, Dad, for loving hard and  teaching us to do the same - even though it sometimes causes pain.
Thank you, Dad, for seeing things in us that we could not see ourselves.
Thank you, Dad, for showing us your wisdom through your actions, not just your words.
Thank you, Dad, for loving so many unconditionally.
Thank you, Dad, for teaching us how to navigate this journey called life that is full of unfair events and free will.

Today, you are pain free, the tremors have disappeared, and your feeding tube has been removed. We envision you embracing your parents Bonnie and James and your siblings Irene, Mildred, and Thelma. We're sure the angels are surrounding you singing hymns of joy welcoming you into your eternal home. Tonight, as we celebrate stories of you, may we find joy as we embrace the pain of human frailty and loss.

God speed, our sweet Daddy. We will carry your spirit and life lessons in our heart forever. Let's let the celebration begin!